Wordless Wednesday... Instagram....

Instagram... I am now apart of this cool and funky way of taking pics.

Wordless Wednesday...baby it's cold outside

Dylan Nell Johansen

As my baby turns 2 today I reflect back on how I felt when she was born. She was perfect she was our world everything we ever wanted. After she was born she was taken up to Primary's Children Hospital because they were worried about her lungs being under developed. She was 3lbs 9oz. At that time nothing felt worse than knowing that my one duty as a mother was to keep my child safe and healthy and I had felt I had let her down, that I had let Luke down. I was devastated.

The next afternoon on Dec 20, 2009 the Dr. came into the room and said that if I was able to get up and move (I had a c-section) that I would be able to leave the hospital for a couple hours and go see my baby. Later that night Luke and I set out to Primary's to see our baby. As we walked into the NICU it felt as thought we had been let into another world. We approached our baby girls bed and was greeted by a nurse. She began to talk to us and let us know their worries and concerns about her. After a couple minuets I stopped listing I went numb. I asked her if she was talking about Down Syndrome, and she said yes. To me that meant the world ended and I wanted to die, one of my worst fears had come true. How long would she live, would Luke leave me, Drake would hate me, our families would be embarrassed and mad and want nothing to do with her and me/us. I had truly failed and I just wanted to run away!!! I had left the NICU and we headed back to our hospital were I cried all night.


Like I said... Today I reflect... I look back and realized that I can't apologize or ever feel guilty for how I felt because they were all very real raw feeling of a naive and closed minded girl. But... today I could not be more grateful for this opportunity to be Dylan's mother to get to see and witness her magic to be apart of this amazing world of T21. She has brought so much joy, love, magic, wonder, to all she comes in contact with. She is my/our little mirical baby. She has showed us what life is truly about.



I end this with sending a GREAT BIG Blogger Happy Birthday to my sweet baby girl Dylan. We love you more than words could ever express. You brought us back to life our sweet angel and for that we will always be greatful to you. Hugs&Luvs baby girl.

UDSF...Christmas Blessings

Some dear friend of ours has set up a mail box in front of there home to collect for the Utah Down Syndrome Foundation. They are truly spreading the word on what Christmas is really about. Please try and stop by their home and check out the lights and donate. Address is... 6388 S. Wakefield Way (5885 W.)

Wordless Wednesday... Christmas boy....

thanks Bree Ellen for the beautiful pic of my baby boy!!!

Wordless Wednesday... Christmas cupcakes....

My supermodel is almost 2!!!

I can't believe she is almost TWO!!! Thank you Bree for capturing her beauty. Dylan truly is my saving grace!!! If you are loving these pics as much as I am head over to Bree's blog and schedule an appointment.

Adventure...

Saturday night we decided to take a trip up to Gateway Mall and have dinner than head over to Temple Square to see the Christmas lights. I must say that this was one of my most favorite nights. It was amazing!!! I was with my wonderful family and friends. The kids were so good and they were just eating up the "adventure"!!! I am truly blessed!!!